Shedmaster flex (Tenzo's stage name)

Grooming my lil' boy is a perpetual task! It doesn't matter how much I brush him, he has the coat of plenty that sheds and sheds and sheds some more!
But look at that face, he's so worth it.

Some ideas for the fur mountain I've brushed today:

-use to knit a sweater for a shivering Chihuahua
-put outside for birds to insulate their nests
-roll up into a ball, stick paper eyes and a mouth on it, and give away to a kid who isn't allowed to have a dog.

Too bad dog fuzz doesn't have the same appeal as cashmere. I could have a very lucrative side business!

Ah well, a girl can dream can't she?

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Where the wild things are

Last night my good friend Anne and I went out and caught a taste of what life's like across the rainbow. WEHO, where boys who love boys and boys with boy toys can be boys who roam free, proud, and in living color-it's like what you'd get if you put gay men in a martini shaker and mixed them with the san diego wild animal park, with a splash of sas!

And like the wild animal park, the species were interesting to observe. There were mating dances, bitches in heat, and uncensored acts of PDA's. I coulda sworn I saw a guys neck scruff in his boy toys jaws. These boys mean business ( *snaps 3 times in a Z formation)!

And talk about twilight zone (cue music).This is the only place in town where beautiful girls become invisible and tits and bootie powers are deemed useless against the other sex. Be forewarned, the WEHO rainbow is L.A.'S version of kryptonite. We waited longer for bar service and did not get hit on by a single guy in the joint. We're not in Kansas anymore, Dorothy!

That gave Anne and I plenty of time to flap our mouths without interuption-we could just chill and have fun while the predators surrounding us pounced on their prey as we enjoyed our estrogen immunity from attack.

Next stop, the Motherload. No, not the kinda place you might think with a name like that! It's a karaoke bar! Woh-wooooh!

When we entered, a big ol' boy was singing his lungs out in a lipstick red dress and a curly wig. The crowd was lively, singing and dancing. The bar was cash only but the $8 drinks were in the most ginormous bar glasses I've ever seen. We tried to get a chance at the mic but the queens woulda put us to shame!

Needless to say we had fun in the land of men who love men. Although women aren't their cup of tea they had no problem letting us into their 'hood with a smile-no dirty looks, no snobbiness or attitudes, just high fives and compliments about things a straight guy wouldn't notice.

Thanks for the hospitality, boys!


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I heart rock band

One of my guilty pleasures is morphing into my alter ego drummer persona "Joyvette" and being a rock star who rips it up on the drums!

I have proudly increased my skill level to "hard" as of yesterday. I think my right calf will be bigger than the left as a result of the base drum pedaling..yuck! The sacrifices of the rock life, I suppose, ha!!

Genius pioneers of interactive video game making, there are legions of folks who love you for this fantastic invention called rock band!
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Clear day, clear head

I needed to get away and wipe my mind clean of everything, so I took Tenzo with me on a hike at Runyan Canyon. Clear blue skies, fluffy clouds, and brisk breezes gave my head the break it needed, all set to the melodies playing from my ipod. A few breaks helped keep Tenzo on track so he was able to keep up with his mommy. It started to sprinkle a little on our way back down the mountain; a little bit of rain to wash our worries away for at least a few hours.
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Cream puffery

Oh gosh, I just inhaled about a dozen or so of these puppies. Gluttony at its best. Damn they're good but the thing is I was full after about 5 of them but I couldn't bring myself to let them go to waste. Oh, the dilemma! Good thing my metabolism rescues me in moments like these.
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Square of 49th Anniversary

Today my mister and I are celebrating our 7th anniversary! He gave me a beautiful floral arrangement and a 2 screen digital photo frame. I gave him one small gift for each year together, each symbolizing something about what we've shared through the years.

His traditional gift will be dinner for 2 at Lawry's Prime Rib and all day with yours truly, as I've taken the day off to spend w/ him.

Happy 2+2+3 babe!
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Nothing's better..

In the middle of a hectic workday, nothing beats sitting outside and basking in the warmth of the sun in perfect 70's weather, cool breezes kissing your cheek...ahh.
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Things to be happy about

Although the past few days have been less than fantastic for me, there are still many things I can be happy about and that I'm grateful for TODAY and every day despite anything I may be going through:

-my health
-all 5 senses
-beautiful mild 70's days to look forward to all week
-my happy, smiling, and smart dog Tenzo
-family and friends
-a great job I love with a great company
-$ in the bank and the ability to pay all of my bills
-physical fitness
-itunes credits still left since Christmas (score! free songs!)
-the kindness of strangers
-every single day of life
-a car that takes me wherever I need to go
-the warmth of sunshine on my face
-my blackberry in all its snazzy glory
-laughter given and received
-learning a new word and inspiring quote a day

And of course, knowing that what doesn't kill me makes me stronger than I can ever fathom.
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Lies, hypocrisy, and inconsistency oh my!

I've had a less than stellar weekend if you can't tell from my most recent entries. I want to clear this shit out of my head so I can focus on more productive and positive thoughts so I apologize, but I too, am human and I'll have some of these days.

Damn I hate when people are dishonest. It can be trivial or gigantic-whatever it is, the fact that they're being dishonest is a problem; why lie? What may very well be nothing becomes something simply out of principle. Especially when you know that person hates it just as much when they feel left in the dark.
Especially those who are supposed to be closest to you. Shouldn't that person be the one who knows everything about you? Shouldn't it be that person whom you confide in, talk to, get advice from? Not some random strangers who hardly know you or your situation enough are in the position to do so properly. Sure they'll tell you what you want to hear because they don't have a clue what else to say! What, like they're going to argue with you? Hello!? Fucking liars!

What's worse? When you call someone out on their dishonesty legitimately and they say YOU are out of line. But many times before they have accused you of the same thing or worse, time after fucking time but WITHOUT an inkling of legitimacy. Fucking hypocrites!

Worse more? When you give your all to something to make it work after dealing with issues such as those just mentioned because you think the person on the other end is pulling just as hard to make it happen. They do-at first, but then slowly and surely they revert back to the same ol' shit. They are consistent at being inconsistent both in their words and even worse, their actions. Fucking inconsistent bastards!

Do you want to lose the people in your life? Drive 'em to the brink of insanity and crazy stress? Do all of the above and you'll rid them out of your life for good. And of course, vice versa if you want to keep them for the rest of your life.

Trust, integrity, and solid character are the most important things to give and get. Without them, you don't have a fighting chance.

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All Talk & No Action makes Joy a very unhappy cookie

When faced with "can't live with it, makes me want to shoot myself in the head" shit in your life, at what point is giving up the appropriate path to take? Normally, I am persistent, resilient, and typically able to obtain/achieve the desired outcome of _________ in my life. Furthermore, I feel that I believe the best in people and always try to "make room", give them the benefit of the doubt; I focus on the positive and treat people how I hope to be treated. I believe in being good to people, especially the people in my life that I value.

I also believe that we are all human, therefore we all have the capacity to make mistakes. I'm fine with that. What I'm not fine with is when someone makes mistakes, apologizes, then continues to repeat these mistakes over and over, wash, rinse, and repeat this dirty little dysfunctional cycle.

There comes a time when, enough is enough. You have to stop kidding yourself and start facing the reality of things. I was, and still am, a firm believer in the idea that you can do ANYTHING, no matter how challenging the task -- but you have to do it 200%, full heart & soul, blood and guts, balls to the walls, hoo-rah to the max.

Bottom line is that you do it. Why? Because you value that thing, whatever that thing or person or goal is. Because it is that important to you to have it in your life. Because you want to show that thing, that person, that goal, that it means that much to them that you can do what you say and say what you do. To demonstrate that yes, you can make a mistake but you can make amends not by your words, but by doing better in that area through your actions, not by bullshit apologies.

Am I just a ball buster or am I correct to assume that it's not too much to ask! It is true, you cannot change people, they have to change themselves using their own will. So what do you do? Remain a victim of circumstance and just accept things as they are?

No. Hell no. Like I said, you can't change people, you can't change circumstance. But if you remove yourself from those people, from those circumstances, then you are changing yourself--the one true thing you have full control over. Yes, it can be painful, it can be frustrating, it can be tragic. It is.

But what's more tragic is just participating in the de ja dysfunction-vu and allowing yourself to re-live and remind yourself how some things, no matter how much you love them and hope that you can repair, just can't be done. It's out of your control and that's something that you just have to come to terms with.

No wishing on a star, caviar dreams, or Harry Potter magic will come along and suddenly make things better, even if, deep down inside you wish there was such a solution.

If you sit and hope to make things better, it just gets worse. You realize that you don't even know this person, thing, or goal anymore - you realize you don't really know what's real vs. fake, truth vs. lies, because if you really stop to think about it, you've been given a little bit of both. So how the fuck are you supposed to distinguish one from the other?

Sometimes, you just have to do what is right. You owe at least that, to yourself. Yes, you will lose something you have worked so hard and invested so much time into. But would you rather continue to lose more, little by little, the longer you just sit and wait and hope for a miracle?

Your heart will always tell you no, and your head will always contradict that. Somewhere between these points, you just have to know when to say when. There are some things in life that will fail you, that's just life.

The best thing you can do is not fail yourself, pick yourself up, dust off, and over time, realize that you did the best thing you could possibly do - sometimes it's better to let go than to give in. You gotta know when to hold - and when to fold. Life is a gamble.

Admittedly, I have learned this the long, hard way with one thing in particular; the only aspect that I cannot excel in (cause you can't do this one alone!), for the life, blood, and guts in me. And I'm hoping that by you reading this, if you are going through something similar in your life, that you come to the realization that I have and that you do what you know you should have done long ago. Do yourself a favor-don't expect anyone to do that for you.